Dear Jesus,

Thank you for guiding Army to victory today.

In God and Coach Monken we trust.

Suck it, Mikey!

(name withheld)

Response from MRFF Supporter

Dear (name withheld) (very appropriate since this is a ‘Dear John’ in that I’ll not be interacting with you further):


Please excuse my writing under a pseudonym but those who write Mikey like you have usually end up being trolls and I don’t want you to have my working mailbox address filled with your crap.


Mikey asked me to reply to you while he was occupied with more important tasks like preventing Christian supremacists from lording it over those who haven’t the position or power to resist.

That said, are you suggesting that your Lard picks sides over something as stupid as football?  Really???

Is he/she/it so banal as to give a shit about an inconsequential children’s’ game when there are so many things that could reasonably occupy his/her/its attention?  Doing away with cancer for instance or revealing his/her/its self as a single universal entity without religion or dogma to emphasize the oneness of all humanity and the stupidity of our petty contrived ‘differences’ and religious obsessions over which we, who profess our ‘love of life’, kill each other with abandon?  Naturally, the figment in your imagination cannot ‘manifest’ itself beyond your pathetic attempt at ‘communication’ since it likely doesn’t exist in realty.


But, no.  Your ‘god’ is a subscription to ESPN with a DVR so you won’t miss a game, err.. ‘religious observance’… what, pray tell, is your god’s ‘official’ sacrament?  Budweiser or Coors?


Are you getting the impression that your comment was simian in its lack of intelligence (no insult to our innocent simian ancestors intended… throwbacks do happen)?


In closing let me just say…


Suck it, (name withheld)!



Response from MRFF Advisory Board Member Mike Farrell


Hi (name withheld),

Has Jesus responded yet? Please let us know if you hear from him.

If not, it may have something to do with his attention being needed elsewhere.

In the meantime, someone else has spoken:

Mike Farrell

(MRFF Board of Advisors)

Response from MRFF Advisory Board Member Joan Slish

 Dear (name withheld),
Mikey and the MRFF don’t have to “suck it” because you said a prayer. Contrary to what you may have heard we are not trying to take religion out of the military. There are laws regarding religious neutrality in any government entity and that includes the military that you may not be aware of.
We are not stopping anyone from going to Chapel because that is the time, place and manner whereby our soldiers are free to practice their faith under our laws.
As defenders of the Constitution we fight for the separation of church and state.
…but no religious Test shall ever be required as a Qualification to any Office or public Trust under the United States.” (Article I, III)
This means that from the President to Congress to the military – no one’s job is based on their religion.
“Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion (Establishment Clause), or prohibiting the free exercise thereof (Free Exercise Clause).”(First Amendment)
The Establishment Clause means that you cannot favor one religion over another even though it is in the majority. This clause respects the rights of all religions. Our military is secular and there are people of other faiths that don the uniform that love this country. 
Retired Supreme Court Justice Sandra Day O’Connor said “We don’t count heads before enforcing the First Amendment.”
The Free Exercise Clause (which is subservient to the Establishment Clause) means that our soldiers are free to exercise any religion they want or no religion at all but cannot elevate one God above others.
“Because religious belief, or non-belief, is such an important part of every person’s life, freedom of religion affects every individual. Religious institutions that use government power in support of themselves and force their views on persons of other faiths, or of no faith, undermine all our civil rights. Moreover, state support of an established religion tends to make the clergy unresponsive to their own people, and leads to corruption within religion itself. Erecting the “wall of separation between church and state,” therefore, is absolutely essential in a free society.” Thomas Jefferson, to the Virginia Baptists (1808) ME 16:320. 
This is his second known use of the term “wall of separation,” here quoting his own use in the Danbury Baptist letter.
This wording of the original was several times upheld by the Supreme Court as an accurate description of the Establishment Clause.
“Jefferson’s concept of “separation of church and state” first became a part of Establishment Clause jurisprudence in Reynolds v. U.S., 98 U.S. 145 (1878). In that case, the court examined the history of religious liberty in the US, determining that while the constitution guarantees religious freedom, “The word ‘religion’ is not defined in the Constitution. We must go elsewhere, therefore, to ascertain its meaning and nowhere more appropriately, we think, than to the history of the times in the midst of which the provision was adopted.” The court found that the leaders in advocating and formulating the constitutional guarantee of religious liberty were James Madison and Thomas Jefferson. Quoting the “separation” paragraph from Jefferson’s letter to the Danbury Baptists, the court concluded that, “coming as this does from an acknowledged leader of the advocates of the measure, it may be accepted almost as an authoritative declaration of the scope and effect of the amendment thus secured.
In 1878 “separation of church and state” became part of the Establishment Clause by law.
The Supreme Court heard the Lemon v. Kurtzman case in 1971 and ruled in favor of the Establishment Clause.
Subsequent to this decision the Supreme Court has applied a three-pronged test to determine whether government action comports with the Establishment Clause, known as the Lemon Test:
Government action violates the Establishment Clause unless it:
1. has a significant secular (i.e., non-religious) purpose,
2. does not have the primary effect of advancing or inhibiting religion
3. does not foster excessive entanglement between government and religion
Parker v. Levy: 
 “This Court has long recognized that the military is, by necessity, a specialized society separate from civilian society… While the members of the military are not excluded from the protection granted by the First Amendment, the different character of the military community and of the military mission requires a different application of those protections. … The fundamental necessity for obedience, and the consequent necessity for imposition of discipline, may render permissible within the military that which would be constitutionally impermissible outside it… Speech that is protected in the civil population may nonetheless undermine the effectiveness of response to command.  If it does, it is constitutionally unprotected.”  Parker v. Levy, 417 U.S. 733, 1974
By telling all of the players to kneel, touch someone and let’s pray is a violation of the Separation of Church and State under the First Amendment, Lemon v. Kurtzman, the Lemon Test and Parker v. Levy.
Superintendent Lt. Gen. Caslen of West Point even agrees with us: 
We are neither an atheist organization nor are we anti-Christian. Mikey is Jewish (and prays to the same Father we do 3 times a day) and 80% of the Board, Advisory Board, volunteers and supporters (300 in total) of the Military Religious Freedom Foundation (MRFF) are Christians. In fact, 96% of our 47,300 soldier clients are Christians.
Check out our mission statement to get to know us better instead of the lies you hear:
Check out the honorable and distinguished military personnel whom we rely on for their expertise on religious neutrality in the military:
I’m sure Jesus is happy that you have invoked his name to tell Mikey – and essentially Lt. Gen. Caslen – to “suck it.” 
Joan Slish
MRFF Advisory Board Member





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1 Comment

  1. Connie

    How do humans change?
    Can we discard being mean
    For practicing love?

    The very attitude of the letter writer turned me away from organized religion a long time ago. As Ghandi said (paraphrased here) – I like your Christ but not your Christians.

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